These past couple weeks have been so emotional for me, I have found purpose, peace and answers to our long frustrating journey to growing our family. (Yes, I am totally crying as I'm writing this, so sorry if thoughts are scattered).
It started about a month ago when I challenged myself to go to the temple once a week again. So the first week I went secretly heart broken and weary and frustrated with a group of friends from high school. I was giving up on our adoption journey and starting to be ok just having Dave and myself as a little family forever. Throughout the session and after in the celestial room in the temple I kept hearing my dad's voice in my head saying "Just wait, Sis. It will be okay. Trust me." I have never had that strong of an experience before. I knew it was the holy ghost, but It's never been that strong! After stopping for ice cream and later getting home I got on Facebook and I stumbled upon a comment on a private LDS adoption group I follow of a lady talking about her embryo adoption agency/business and a link to her website. I clicked on it and as it pulled up I got the 2nd most strongest feeling that this is what we need to do! I had never heard of this! I was super confused and wanting to know more. So I got on good ol' Youtube and found the ladies story (below) and I was shocked and amazed. When Dave got home I told him everything and he was excited and all for it. We contacted the lady and she gave us more information and later sent us paperwork. She said it will most likely be around a 6 months waiting game after we get paperwork in. She also said to look at other places and get on other waiting lists. We did. so now there are 3 options. Just what ever happens first is what we will go with. (most likely it will be hers)
1) If we get the green light from her, she will ship the embryos to our clinic and my specialist will start the process.
2) We're on her doctors list as well. He is in Portland, but it costs 1/3 less because his way doesn't need an attorney, its just in office and the embryos are already donated. We have friends 15 minutes away in Vancover so we would probably just drive up and stay with them.
3) My specialist is rolling out with an EA program and we're like 26th in line. Probably not going to happen.
I bet you are wondering what the crap I'm talking about, huh?!
So! When a couple has an IVF (where they take the sperm and egg to form embryos) sometimes they have extra left over. You can either freeze them, donate them to science, have them be destroyed or a newer thing have them be adopted! Once they are adopted they finish the process of implanting some of them into the womans body and hopefully takes and grows into a baby(s)!
One thought I had after we were educated and before we submitted for paperwork was that I need to be able to carry a baby. How can I carry a baby if I can't even get pregnant? I went to get a zone from the lovely Teresa. I was unloading everything to her and we muscle tested and felt really good about 3 embryos being transfered when the time comes.
It was confirmed in the temple and in the sweetest blessing Dave gave me the other night. One thing that was said was "it dosnt matter if you deliver a healthy baby by embryo adoption or if you choose to adopt from a birth mother, You will recieve the same spirit." How sweet is that? It is amazing to me that his plan is bigger than mine. I never would of thought this could happen. I get to carry my adoptive children. I don't have to miss out on any of our childrens experiences. Especially their entrance into this world. I know he has guided us to the best alternative we didnt even know was out their! He knows our needs and wishes and he hears our prayers and is on our side, If we just go to him in prayer and faith and patience he will bless us! The past few days he has been unfolding his plan for us and his plan is SO much bigger than ours, If we live righteously and follow his commandments, he will show us the way to be happy and guide our lives to bless us. I know this first hand and this is my testimony.
Sunday, October 12, 2014
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Yeah... I'm bad.
So the other day I was thinking, "I guess I should blog again. Didn't I just write a post?" Yeah.. like a month and a half ago. Good job Hannah. Haha! I'm sure we all do this. AmIright?! Time just keeps going whether we like it or not, I guess.
So anyways! What's new you ask?
Well! I started to nanny for a lady in my parents ward. Oh. My. Gosh! Her kids are seriously the CUTEST! I have fallen in love. I watch the 2 youngest boys. "C" the 3 year old and "W" the 1 year old, and they have my heart. We have had some serious fun! In fact he tells his mom and dad to go back to work when they get home so we can keep playing. We love playing with play dough, and monster trucks, playing on the iPad, going in the back yard to jump on the tramp, decorating cookies, and reading stories.
Last week Dave and I took them on a outing to the Aquarium in Draper. What an adventure that day was! It was great! C was so good. He held my had and would ask to run to the corner and back when we were walking. We saw some sharks, starfish, ducks, penguins and other fish and things then after asking C if he was hungry we went to the Cafe to get lunch. HAHAHA!!! What a lunch. We ordered him food and sat town when all of a sudden W looked very concentrated and turned red then just let loose with explosive diarrhea. everywhere. How embarrassing! it was all over the floor, all over me and him, and it was in my shoes. EW! EW! EW! I cringed every step to the bathroom holding him out so I don't get more poop on me and when we got to the bathroom I stripped him and gave him a wipe down, twice- including myself. Of course it was the day I forgot to see if there was an extra pair of clothes so I had to buy him a new shirt at the gift store. The whole time C was enjoying his lunch with Dave. I am so grateful he was there with me.
On the way home we just laughed. For the first time in my life, I am very grateful for my training as a CNA. Anyways! Here's some pictures before the lunch encounter. Lol
This pose still cracks me up!
Cupcakes are still going well. I did a cousins wedding reception a few weeks ago. She was beautiful, he was handsome, and the cupcakes were gorgeous!
A few weeks ago I went to the new Ogden temple open house with the primary kids and it was so sweet to see their faces on the tour of the inside. It is so immaculate, I am so excited for my mom who will be one of the temple workers.
One of my other cousins was sealed last week. It was a beautiful ceremony and awful weather outside. Before the storm, I took this beauty. I just love this picture.
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We also went to see Wicked in July. It was amazing. My third time and Daves first. He loved it! And now hates the Wizard of Oz.
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We have decided to try embryo adoption. It is like 80% cheaper than "normal" adoption. If you aren't familiar with embryo adoption it's basically where We adopt a baby in embryo form and I can carry the baby.
When a couple has extra embryos when doing IVF, they can either donate them to science, have them destroyed, or frozen for later. I had no idea about the adoption or we would have done it sooner. Were on 2 waiting lists so we will see what comes of it. We are very excited.
Dave is still working as a PI. He is so sick of it. He is looking for another job, but can't find one that pays as much as he's making now. He has a really good shot with Cigna as a SIU Investigator in Arizona at a new branch they're in the process of making plans for building in the spring of 2015. Which is awesome! We've been looking to get out of the safe "Utah bubble" for a while.
So anyways! What's new you ask?
Well! I started to nanny for a lady in my parents ward. Oh. My. Gosh! Her kids are seriously the CUTEST! I have fallen in love. I watch the 2 youngest boys. "C" the 3 year old and "W" the 1 year old, and they have my heart. We have had some serious fun! In fact he tells his mom and dad to go back to work when they get home so we can keep playing. We love playing with play dough, and monster trucks, playing on the iPad, going in the back yard to jump on the tramp, decorating cookies, and reading stories.
Last week Dave and I took them on a outing to the Aquarium in Draper. What an adventure that day was! It was great! C was so good. He held my had and would ask to run to the corner and back when we were walking. We saw some sharks, starfish, ducks, penguins and other fish and things then after asking C if he was hungry we went to the Cafe to get lunch. HAHAHA!!! What a lunch. We ordered him food and sat town when all of a sudden W looked very concentrated and turned red then just let loose with explosive diarrhea. everywhere. How embarrassing! it was all over the floor, all over me and him, and it was in my shoes. EW! EW! EW! I cringed every step to the bathroom holding him out so I don't get more poop on me and when we got to the bathroom I stripped him and gave him a wipe down, twice- including myself. Of course it was the day I forgot to see if there was an extra pair of clothes so I had to buy him a new shirt at the gift store. The whole time C was enjoying his lunch with Dave. I am so grateful he was there with me.
On the way home we just laughed. For the first time in my life, I am very grateful for my training as a CNA. Anyways! Here's some pictures before the lunch encounter. Lol
This pose still cracks me up!
Cupcakes are still going well. I did a cousins wedding reception a few weeks ago. She was beautiful, he was handsome, and the cupcakes were gorgeous!
A few weeks ago I went to the new Ogden temple open house with the primary kids and it was so sweet to see their faces on the tour of the inside. It is so immaculate, I am so excited for my mom who will be one of the temple workers.
One of my other cousins was sealed last week. It was a beautiful ceremony and awful weather outside. Before the storm, I took this beauty. I just love this picture.
Oh! and at my other cousins wedding in Idaho, one of my other cousins came up to me and showed me this gem. I thought it was HILARIOUS! thought I'd share. Look at my hair and those glasses! Haha
We also went to see Wicked in July. It was amazing. My third time and Daves first. He loved it! And now hates the Wizard of Oz.
When a couple has extra embryos when doing IVF, they can either donate them to science, have them destroyed, or frozen for later. I had no idea about the adoption or we would have done it sooner. Were on 2 waiting lists so we will see what comes of it. We are very excited.
Dave is still working as a PI. He is so sick of it. He is looking for another job, but can't find one that pays as much as he's making now. He has a really good shot with Cigna as a SIU Investigator in Arizona at a new branch they're in the process of making plans for building in the spring of 2015. Which is awesome! We've been looking to get out of the safe "Utah bubble" for a while.
Monday, July 14, 2014
It's Here.
I finally did it. I started my own business! After the thought every once in a while for the past 5 years and again more recently trying to come up with ways to pay for our adoption, I decided that I have almost nothing to loose. I found an amazing business advisor, she is helping me get everything in order and it's coming along great and faster that I thought it would! You can take a look at my website and order at http://frostedcupcakerybyhannah.blogspot.com. I am also on facebook.
This past weekend I went to a cousins bridal shower and decorated cupcakes. They were so cute and I got 2 events out of it. I am so excited!! I cannot wait to see what this new chapter in our life brings.
This past weekend I went to a cousins bridal shower and decorated cupcakes. They were so cute and I got 2 events out of it. I am so excited!! I cannot wait to see what this new chapter in our life brings.
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
June
June went by really fast and was filled with some fun little things almost every day. I wish time would slow down a bit. Sheesh! First off, I went to the Doctor due to some tmi issues I wont go into, but in short, I'm going to be doing a couple IUI's back to back. The first IUI will be normal, and the second one we will try injectible ovulation medication. YIKES!!! I am NOT going to love giving myself a shot for a few days. But I am glad I have phlebotomy experience.
The difference with the second round is the medication releases more eggs. So there is a higher chance of multiples. Dave is freaking out thinking were going to have triplets and I'm over here thinking nothing will happen because I have completely given up going this route for having kids. But it's way cheaper than a $35,000 adoption loan and that's why were still trying with the infertility doctor. One thing I really love about visiting the IF doctor is the non-normal is normal! and they care more about your feelings and they have a lot of different options, it just depends on how much you are willing to spend.
Anyways, this month we helped my best friend Chelsee move into her new apartment.
We celebrated our 5th Wedding Anniversary! We have been through a lot together, and this years anniversary was extra special. There were a lot of awesome special feelings going around. I don't know why or how, but it for sure felt different in a good way.
I got a 5 year anniversary band and I bought Dave and I tickets to go see wicked. He has never seen it, but he is super excited to go when it comes this month. I've seen it twice and I'm very excited to see it again.
We went to Bear Lake at the end of the month for a few days. It was really fun! Even though it rained most of the time we were there. The first day we were there Dave needed to use some wifi to get a report off, so we drove into Montpelier where we found the cutest coffee shop. My grandparents lived in that town, so of course we had to drive by, snap a picture and blow kisses.
We took some pictures at the beach, it was cold and windy and was raining really hard on one of our daily four wheeler rides. But we loved every minute of it!
The sunsets were beautiful every night!
After some thoughts and comments and a talk with my business adviser, I am going to be starting my own cupcake business! I am so excited and thrilled. I have a lot to do before I say anything more, but I thought you would like to know. It seems to be a really good fit for me right now. I love how I can do it out of my home and on my own time. It's a perfect fit next to my nanny job starting next month.
The difference with the second round is the medication releases more eggs. So there is a higher chance of multiples. Dave is freaking out thinking were going to have triplets and I'm over here thinking nothing will happen because I have completely given up going this route for having kids. But it's way cheaper than a $35,000 adoption loan and that's why were still trying with the infertility doctor. One thing I really love about visiting the IF doctor is the non-normal is normal! and they care more about your feelings and they have a lot of different options, it just depends on how much you are willing to spend.
Anyways, this month we helped my best friend Chelsee move into her new apartment.
We celebrated our 5th Wedding Anniversary! We have been through a lot together, and this years anniversary was extra special. There were a lot of awesome special feelings going around. I don't know why or how, but it for sure felt different in a good way.
I got a 5 year anniversary band and I bought Dave and I tickets to go see wicked. He has never seen it, but he is super excited to go when it comes this month. I've seen it twice and I'm very excited to see it again.
We went to Bear Lake at the end of the month for a few days. It was really fun! Even though it rained most of the time we were there. The first day we were there Dave needed to use some wifi to get a report off, so we drove into Montpelier where we found the cutest coffee shop. My grandparents lived in that town, so of course we had to drive by, snap a picture and blow kisses.
We took some pictures at the beach, it was cold and windy and was raining really hard on one of our daily four wheeler rides. But we loved every minute of it!
The sunsets were beautiful every night!
After some thoughts and comments and a talk with my business adviser, I am going to be starting my own cupcake business! I am so excited and thrilled. I have a lot to do before I say anything more, but I thought you would like to know. It seems to be a really good fit for me right now. I love how I can do it out of my home and on my own time. It's a perfect fit next to my nanny job starting next month.
Sunday, June 8, 2014
Our Very Merry Month of May
...Was really busy! We finished putting together and had our adoption carnival. You can click here to read about it. We also had my sisters high school graduation. I thought there were a lot of kids that graduated. Good for them! It was stated that over half the kids received some kind of scholarship. That's amazing. Go Lancers.
My birthday was the same day as her graduation, so Dave and I celebrated my birthday last Monday. I got a new swimming suit, 2 new shirts and a pair of shorts and he took me to my favorite restaurant. I love him. My family will celebrate with me soon.
Oh and for more good news, we paid off the Saturn last week. YAY!!!!!
My birthday was the same day as her graduation, so Dave and I celebrated my birthday last Monday. I got a new swimming suit, 2 new shirts and a pair of shorts and he took me to my favorite restaurant. I love him. My family will celebrate with me soon.
Oh and for more good news, we paid off the Saturn last week. YAY!!!!!
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
The Sock Song
So I have found the SHAYTARDS on youtube a few months ago, and have been watching these entertaining videos when ever I have a few minutes. Shay is so amazing. He is one of the greatest guys I know... don't know? lol. I have never met him. But he vlogs every day so I feel like I know him. (He is the one that created a business and sold it to Disney a few months ago.) His family is so amazing too. I love how he and his wife raise there kids. They are so confident and sweet. I think it has to do with there parenting style too. I just love it. Anyways, here is one of his comercials for socks they did and its soooo funny.
April
So I noticed I havent blogged this month and tomorrow is the 30th. Oops.. Give me a break!!! I've been doing adoption stuff. like preparing for this!
And all this stupid paper work still. We are almost done with it. Only like a few more parts to a question.
Oh man! I cannot wait until we can have our money raised and our paperwork in. I am super glad my cousin found that carnival. It's been in the works since December. At the booth were going to have a silent auction, a gourmet cupcake stand with 5 different flavors and some cakeballs in a cup for little kids. We will also have more baby bibs and some knitted tea cup sets. And if I can find time in between now and then from making 20 dozen cupcakes, 3 batches of cakeballs and soliciting, I may make some bath bombs to sell too.
SO COME OUT TO SUPPORT US AND SEE DAVE AND I. Also, if you have something you want to donate to the silent auction, it would be gratefully accepted. it can be anything, big or small. The best part of the carnival is what ever amount of money we make, is ours.
Some other things we have done this month was to go out with some of my friends from high school for Jordans birthday. It was so much fun!! We spent the whole day in SLC. We met at Toscano's for lunch.
Then we walked around City Creek. Then we went to take a tour at the LDS Conference Center and walked around Temple Square. Then we went to The Melting Pot for dessert.
Oh man! I cannot wait until we can have our money raised and our paperwork in. I am super glad my cousin found that carnival. It's been in the works since December. At the booth were going to have a silent auction, a gourmet cupcake stand with 5 different flavors and some cakeballs in a cup for little kids. We will also have more baby bibs and some knitted tea cup sets. And if I can find time in between now and then from making 20 dozen cupcakes, 3 batches of cakeballs and soliciting, I may make some bath bombs to sell too.
SO COME OUT TO SUPPORT US AND SEE DAVE AND I. Also, if you have something you want to donate to the silent auction, it would be gratefully accepted. it can be anything, big or small. The best part of the carnival is what ever amount of money we make, is ours.
Some other things we have done this month was to go out with some of my friends from high school for Jordans birthday. It was so much fun!! We spent the whole day in SLC. We met at Toscano's for lunch.
Then we walked around City Creek. Then we went to take a tour at the LDS Conference Center and walked around Temple Square. Then we went to The Melting Pot for dessert.
It was a beautiful fun filled day. Oh, and also a selfie with President Monson and Uchdorf because I'm wierd. (No, but really my family is tight with President Monson. He was going to come to our wedding, but his grandson was getting sealed the same morning so he coudnt make it, but he said he was in the temple and was thinking of us.)
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